When I was younger, wilder and more foolish, the plan (let's call it plan 1.0) was to amass 300k in cash and investments by age 30 and then quit work. Full stop. Like that was the extent of the "grand plan" - no more, no less. Quit work to do what? For how long? Why the arbitrary age 30? Surely 300k cannot be enough for the rest of my life. Anyway, those thoughts did not come to mind then and I started working with a single-minded pursuit of the plan. Somehow, I kind of blasted past 300k before age 30, and the goal post shifted further - the new plan (plan 2.0) was to amass 500k in cash and investments and then quit work. Quit work to do what? For how long? I still cannot answer these questions definitively but at least compared to when I first hatched plan 1.0, I have some idea this time.
Well, I want to decompress for 1 year and reorientate my life without the pressures and influence of full time employment.
My current job is actually quite the gravy train so far - relatively high paying, not very stressful and I have a very good work life balance. But something is and has been gnawing at my soul - I feel like a mindless drone at work, clocking in day in and day out, biding my time as I collect my the pay checks. Surely, there has to be more to life. And that is what I want to discover. Since young, I've never felt "self-directed". And in my home country, it is very difficult to be self directed when the country's systems and culture are all about "fitting in". The price to pay for not fitting in is very high. But while I'm a beneficiary of the local systems (at least so far), I don't feel that I belong and I don't aspire to succeed in its classic sense. I admire those who are self directed, who are blind to or indifferent towards the invisible (but oh so very present) barriers of our nation's mentally-exhausting narrative of exceptionalism, "little room for error" systems and repressive culture, and who can thrive outside the system.
Over the years, I've done (I think too good) a job at shrugging off exceptionalism and disconnecting my identity and self-worth from my job. And even though I'm in one of the (more recognised) professions, while I don't hate it, I don't feel any instrinsic joy, pride or ego. I don't talk about my work and don't think much of it.
Everyday, I'm fantasizing about jumping off the gravy train and pressing the blinking "Life Reset" button.
What will it take for me to pull the cord? If all goes well, I will have amassed 500k in cash and investments in a couple of months. Will I fulfil plan 2.0 or shift the goal post further?
Will 2021 be the year in which I finally pull the cord and live out this silly heart's desires?
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